To Those Called Icarus

I finally got my own laptop today, very sweet. I'm totally loving being able to just chill in my room and write. It's so... I don't know... less confining than writing at a desk. Plus, I love messing with my webcam... *tee hee*

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I've been reflecting a lot today. Actually buying the rest of my stuff for college has got me freaking out on the inside. I mean, I know that I'm ready for it. No question of that. But I don't know. I had so much that I wanted to get accomplished this summer.

I wanted to finish my novel, I wanted to find out who I was. I wanted to make memories that I would never, ever forget.

There's this part of me that wants to feel completely free and reckless and alive... but that little voice that hangs around in the back of my head won't let loose the other part. The result is this constant war between my two selves. I was supposed to become someone else this summer, someone confident and out-going and fun, but instead, I'm who I've always been. Bummer.

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I've been wanting to change up my writing style lately. All of my stuff is so *cute* and *adorable* but I want to write something that's going to change the world one day. I know that's a lot to strive for... but it's nice to have goals. Even if you can never accomplish them.

I've been listening to a band called The Orphan, The Poet and I'm very impressed with their stuff. I'd like to write something like that one day, maybe. Something that will eventually mean something to someone.

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To Those Called Icarus by The Orphan, The Poet